How the mind’s simple operating system distorts the world and traps us in the past

object relation self-imageHow the Mind Relates to the World and Others…

There is you/me

There is the other

There is an energetic/emotional/mental relationship between the two that connects to the past and the present is seen and interpreted through this lens.

Our experiences before and after birth impress upon our mind and nervous system as memory traces – mostly unconscious. These impressions form the building blocks for all future interactions with the world and others as the mind tries to learn from experiences by interpreting events and comparing what’s happening now to the past (projecting the past onto the present) and anticipating the future. These internal mental relationships are called object relations.

Here’s the Rub a Dub Dub

  1. This process, over time, establishes a sense of self and a worldview – the majority of which is unconscious
  2. either orOur normal, thinking, aware self is continually experiencing a distorted “reality” because of this
  3. The mind’s fundamental operating system is binary – either/or – do this or that. Even when we are weighing a multitude of options, if you look closely, you will see it reduces to an either/or choice
  4. This begins when we are very, very small and defenseless (vulnerable)

So deep down…

internalized self-imageThere’s little, dependent, vulnerable, weak, needy me (because this was in fact objective truth)

And there is the big, strong, capable, intelligent other (can be a person, a thing, an idea, a belief, anything)

And there is the energetic/emotional connection between us – I love the other, I hate the other, the other frustrates me, I want to become like the other, I need the other, I reject the other, on and endless on.

object-relations-dance-do-si-doAnd since the mind is operating on either/or – the strategy for dealing with this whole can of worms is either stay small or get big (reverse the roles) – which results in us dancing through life in a do-si-do as both partners bounce back and forth between the big and small roles.. oh so repetitive and tiring!

And this is what we think of as normal existence, living, and relating. It’s what 99.9999% us humans are doing most of our lives.

The Third Choice

beyond object relationsThe only way to break free of this endless activity is by choosing what is behind door three, but the mind only knows of two doors – either/or – pain/pleasure – comparing this to that on a continuum of options through the filter of experience and within an “artificially created sense of self.”

Door 3 can be quite scary because what’s behind there can be totally unknown, and our friend, the mind, truly loves to “know in advance” (compare, project, and anticipate) how to deal with whatever is there (either/or) accept/reject, fight or flight…

You hear what I’m saying? – to discover what is outside of our “known” world and sense of self, we have to return to the original place that existed before this run-amok process started. And what was that like?

Well, it was pre-mind, so there goes our knowing. It was pre-capability, so there goes that (to the mind). In short, it necessitates a return to EXTREME sensitivity, vulnerability, and openness.

And, since we were physically little more than a blob of protoplasm when this all started, this gets associated with physical death and/or mental annihilation.

This is how the body/mind under the influence of this process reacts = TERROR!!!!

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